I have only 10 days left... "Hearing"

Well, things really aren't getting any less busy, BUT, I have found time to sit down and write a little and and then find time again to blog about the experience...
I usually find myself on days when I don't have work or school going to a prayer that's a little north of me. It's a quiet place and I find that time has it's own flow there.
An hour can feel like ten minutes and ten minutes can feel like an hour... but it's the place that I go to get quiet, to sit, to listen and to write, draw and pray (not particularly in that order). I call it my 'mountain top'.

But today's writing is going to be a little longer, the challenge posed was this, "What sound set your life spinning?"
This question all comes out of the past few challenges of being still, allowing memories and thoughts to be anchored by a physical focus; ie, breathing, the position of your hands, even what you hear... and what you have heard affects you.

So, Natalie Goldberg asks a simple question, when in your life did a sound, that you perceived, rock your whole world at that moment.

This story is one that I consider a changing moment for me and I felt that it is something that I needed to write down, so that it can be shared to you and others and be allowed the opportunity to encourage.

Be blessed!

"Hearing"

This is another story about Kansas City; I had been out of the Onething Internship for about 3-4 months; life at that point was a series of late nights and work.

A typical day would be; wake up at noon, go to work, come back around 6 or 7 at night, hang out with good friends, eat food and play music till about 2 am (activities of the night were determined by how many people were over, which ranged from 2 to 30), then to bed.
This was a fantastic time for me, becuase I got to hang out with all these cool people and got to develop relationships; friendships, sisters and brothers, with these people that I may not have otherwise...

But my relationship with the Father was suffering.

One night, I was chatting online with a friend of mine that really challenged me with, "was I living this christian walk becuase it was what I believed or becuase it was the only thing I knew to be right?"

That really grabbed my heart and I remember laying in my bed just journallying this struggle within me, "God, why do I follow you?"

After about an hour or two I was on my face on the floor and I heard God ask, "Eric, do you want a thunderstorm to prove my love for you?"

I told God no, thinking that it wasn't "righteous" to take God up on his offer, so I answered, "God, your presence is enough."

But God knew what I needed; he saw the wounded heart of his son and knew that he needed more than just an etheral expression of "his presence" to know the love that He (God) had for him, he needed something, real.

No more than the words, "...is enough." had left me lips then I heard a monsterous clap of thunder roll across my room...

I grew up in the plains of Missouri, so I'm pretty used to thunderstorms, but this was something else...

It was deep, piercing through wall, window and mind, it captured your attention and as it rolled by you, you heard it's physical presence make itslef known by the car alarms that were going off outside.

You felt it's vibraitons in your chest, and as my mind, ear and heart heard it, I knew it to be an expression of the heart of the Father towards his, son.

And I wept...

With each casading rythme and beat, a new wave of tears swelled within my eyes as I saw this expression of sound turn into the layers of God's love that he had for me. 

I couldn't move, I could barely breathe, as I allowed the tears to flow and my heart to break open as love flowed to take the place of fear, rejection and the wounds that we carry in our hearts.

Finally, I was able to stand, a few of my friends were sitting in the living room; one of them being a girl that I felt was an older sister to me.

I laugh and smile a little at the thought, becuase she asked me if I had ever felt or had God make something that we could see, hear, taste, smell or feel.  

And I told her what had just happened in that bedroom and that this storm that we all were experiencing was God showing his love for me.

She marveled at that thought for a minute, but as the night went on and the storm contunued to flash and roll with it's thunder, she would radomly, and frequently, hit me in the arm, pretty hard too. And give me a look as to say, "I know that God made this for you and I'm jealous that he did."

But all I could do was smile; becuase I was with and around these that cared for me and I for them, a place that was warm, friendly, light with laughter and a joy in the eyes...

And outside, was a manifestation of love, from a God that cared for me enough to show his heart through something that I loved, a thunderstorm.

Thanks for reading everyone! Here are some pics on a piece that I'm working on in sculpture; the final piece is going to be carved out of stone! :D
The clay model is only about 4 inches high... I'm hoping to find a good piece of stone and carve it out so that it's 6 or 8 inches... we will see!

Have a great night my friends,

-Eric Alan

Bolt and Bicycle

Hello fellow blogrimager's!... and other people :)

Today's reading from "Old Friend from Far Away" was pretty short, just two simple writing challenges called "Bolt" and "Bicycle".
Here are the descriptions for the writings; Bolt: "Tell me about a time something dawned on you, a realization, worlds came together or simply you saw a lightening bolt on a mountain. Where are you? Go for ten minutes."
And for Bicycle: "Tell me about a memory associated with a bicycle. The spokes, the wheels, the narrow seat. Go for ten."

And without further ado... I give you "Bolt" and "Bicycle". Enjoy! See you all tomorrow (maybe, I have to drive 12 hours tomorrow so we will see what happens, until next time then!)

"Bolt"

Nothing really comes to mind at the present; there was one moment though.
I was about 16-18 years old, I was laying my my bed waiting for the sleep to take me for the night, when I heard the sound of thunder in the distance.
I knew inside of me that this was going to be a big storm, and I love watching thunderstorms unfold amongst the stage of creation, so I sat up in my bed, turned to my window and gave a shove as the old sill creaked against the effort.
I took a deep breath and felt the cool wind brush against my cheeks, the smell of rain filled my nostrils as thought the air itself was pregnant with the rain that we were about to receive, the smell of it seemed to drift through me. And there, in the far distance, across an acre of our lawn, past the highway, over the corn fields that lay in the front of the house and past the silo that kept steady watch over us; the sky blackened with intensity of an ever approaching storm.
Lighting flashed across the sky making what was night, day, and showing a dance amongst the billowing clouds the energy that it felt...

In that moment when all was still and there I was leaning out my window watching the scene of legends past, unfold, a still and small voice spoke to me.

Not a voice that you hear with your ears, but a voice that calls from within you and travels through you and makes itself known to your thoughts, and it said, "I made this for you."

Times Up!

"Bicycle"

The memory that I have of bicycle(s), is the annual trip that my grandparents hosted up in northern Iowa, maybe Minnesota... Anyways, they had a couple of campers and they would take the whole family up to this camp ground that had this huge barn that was converted to a restaurant.

We would run around like young cousins do; climbing in places we weren't supposed too, playing cards in the cramped and humid quarters of a campers kitchen table (to escape the mosquitoes), swimming in the local pool, floating down a near by river; but the big reason we were all there, was for the bike trail...
It ran several miles, starting in one small, non-descript town; lazily crossing several rivers, an innumerable small creeks, through several other small towns that all boasted of fantastic local food (which it was!) and little stores that possessed all sorts of interesting items awaiting the curious to discover.

Every morning, grandpa would check all our bikes to make sure that they worked right and then we all (the cousins) would head out on the trail, simply going a mile or two as we were instructed by our adults, and usually one following us :(
But once every trip we would do the big bike ride!

All the aunts, uncles, grandma and grandpa and cousins young and younger would get up early on the chosen morning, mount up on our individual bikes that were available, and we would ride our butts off all day long.
Sometimes we would take quite a few stops here and there, taking in sights and time and eating our full at the local places and always searching for a way to quench our thirst in the hot noon day sun, drinking our fill of water whenever we had the chance.

Times Up!

Hoped you guys are enjoying the writings, let me know what you'll think.
Looking forward to what memories are revived as this blogrimage continues!
Take care.

-Eric Alan